A fab quote from the great Anthony Robbins that I feel works well as an introduction to a post about 'beliefs'.
Our beliefs are personal to us. I am sure there have been many times in your life when you have met a person who has a completely different opinion on a subject to you. This is often hard to understand. Who is right, who is wrong? Maybe no-one, maybe both!
Our beliefs about our world come from the things that happen to us, what we see, hear and do. As we experience things we notice the outcomes we get and if we get the same result over and over again it becomes 'fact' for us. In turn we start to filter out anything that doesn't fit with our new belief convincing us all the more that what we believe is right. But actually it is just what we 'think' or to be more correct what we 'imagine' is right.
What you believe dictates the choices you make for yourself and the actions that you take. What you think about things therefore affects your behaviour. Every behaviour has a consequence and so you are in control of what happens to you in your life by what you tell yourself - your thoughts.
Taking responsibility for your thoughts (and therefore your actions) is a big step forward in achieving the life that you want.
Step 1 - Recognise which of your beliefs are not working for you. A good indicator is whether something is making you feel bad in some way.
Step 2 - Evaluate the 'truth' of your beliefs. Take the filter off for a while. Deliberately look for information to test whether this particular belief is always true - or NOT!
Step 3 - Replace the negative thoughts with new positive ones that fit with your new understanding gained from step 2.
So 3 simple steps then! But just proving to yourself that what you believe about something isn't true doesn't make the process of change easy. Even something painful can be 'comfortable' because it is familiar and what we know. It is easier to do what we've always done..... You can see where the title of this post came from now can't you ;-)
For your new belief to become comfortable it needs to be practised consciously until it becomes familiar enough so as to become a more deep routed belief at the subconscious level. You don't really have to think about it anymore you just feel that way. Just like when you are learning a new motor skill for example driving a car. At first you are very consciously aware of everything you need to do but with time and practise you get to a point where you barely notice that you are changing gear, stepping on the brake, stopping at a red light. In fact you can sing along to the radio or chat with a friend whilst you are doing it.
With a commitment to succeed the Cancel technique provides a structured way to practise new thought patterns. At first it will take effort but it is worth it. In time you will begin to notice a subtle shift in how you are thinking as your new belief becomes a part of your subconscious programming, in turn the choices you make and the actions you take will reflect this. Remember you are responsible for your thoughts, your thoughts dictate your actions, every action you make has a consequence that impacts on your life. Your head creates your world. You are in control of your life.
And once you have learnt how to make a change in one area of your life you may find other beliefs that no longer work for you and change them too.
If you'd like support exploring the ideas presented on this post you may be interested to learn more about my Happy Mums! programme.